Comfort vs. Discomfort. Big topic. Especially for people who have been stalled out in some parts of their life.
If you are too comfortable, you stagnate. Nothing challenges you. You accept the limitations that you’ve created that you can not overcome without a little bit of stretching outside of your normal routine. If you are excessively “safe” your mind may be numbed, your body may be desensitized and your dreams may be hard to motivate yourself toward. After all, you are comfortable. There’s no urgency to create anything bigger.
If you are too uncomfortable, you can be consumed by anxiety and fear, pain and suffering . After all, very few would opt to be in a position of starvation, homelessness or physical pain for an extended period of time, even in the name of “personal growth.”
The idea is to be comfortable enough to feel safe and stable, and uncomfortable enough in the areas where you have been stagnant to make a change.
Stability is a good thing. Complacency is where things get murky and life gets small.
Where are you not being challenged right now? Where are you not challenging yourself?
Want to move outside of the lines you’ve drawn for your life?
It is all very easy. There is no “perfection” involved.
Just take a step.
Go to a class, write a letter to a mentor, crash the party, show up at a lecture, plan a career switch, meet with a mentor, get a therapist, hire a trainer, sign up for yoga classes… whatever it is…take a step.
And then, take another step.
Keep going until you are officially immersed in a place where you once felt stuck. Dive in and figure it out. Let yourself expand. Own it. Whatever it may be.
In New York as a kid, my friend and I crashed the occasional party. He had a knack for knowing what was happening and the thrill alone was worth the risk. At a huge premiere party at the New York Public Library, with a red carpet that rows-deep in paparazzi on both sides, we walked up. He pulled out a magazine, held it up to cover my head and grabbed me, running me through the red sea of flashbulbs as the crowd went crazy. “Who is it?!” everyone was screaming. I will admit, it was a thrilling and nuts moment all at once. I was shaking. It was just me. I was a college student. I didn’t even have a job. We ran into the library. Since I was the one who was the “shrouded superstar” that night, when people approached, I had to own it. It was terrifying. It may sound stupid and shallow, but from that evening on I never felt “uncomfortable” in what were once very uncomfortable social situations. I learned to own a part of me that was content to hide. While it was the last party we crashed, and it was the most deeply uncomfortable I had been socially up to that point in my life, it flipped a switch in me.
It may seem rare to have such a dramatic moment where you have to either jump in or run away, but we have them every day. When someone approaches who takes your breath away because you are so attracted to them, you have that moment. When you see an opportunity to do something like save a lost animal or volunteer in a way that exposes you to raw humanity you have that moment. It seems we create these moments when we want to grow. When we want to be pushed to the edge. When we want to live bigger.
HERE is an amazing article from LifeHacker about living outside of your comfort zone. It can help you see things from a rational and even technical perspective.
If you want to be simple about it, just commit every day to moving one step forward in an area where you have been stagnant and remind yourself that as soon as you are officially uncomfortable you are onto great things!
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