How do you treat love in your life?

Its a big question.

It can get very psychoanalytical or it can be very simple.

I love this bit of Brene Brown because it makes it most clear that we don’t connect to others through a series of surface transactions depicted in romanic comedies and advice columns. We don’t give and take affection… not when it is real. It’s not a game, a checklist or any other kind of power play.

We create it. For ourselves and with other people.  It just is. And it continues to be because we continue to create it.

If you can distance yourself from the hype of  too many “love experts” (by the way: many who are divorced, single and even some in very unhealthy relationships, check out who you are listening to!) and the fears and projections of people around you, you may be able to see this far more easily outside of the noise.

The worst advice in love I’ve been given has been from very famous experts. Two of them. One told me to hunt for men (seriously?) wearing super scandalous clothes and pounds of makeup at…wait for it… airports!!! (I declined) and another was sure that I had to give up my career to find a man that would love me. (Seriously?!)

And, here we are.

And I’m so glad I never listened!

Have you been walking around with weird “expert” ideas about love?  A sort of cynicism? Skepticism?  Do these ideas really fit with what you believe to actually be true about life and love, or do they make you feel strange?

I’m all about simple.

If you are doing un-natural things, things that actually make you feel bad or fake or somehow less than yourself,  all in the name of “getting” love, this might help you.

And, whether you feel loved by a beloved or are in romantic love or not at the moment, there’s never a shortage of necessity to treat yourself  brilliantly.

I’m not a “love expert”  but any means, but I do super-love my life and the world and so much and so many.   Now I love far more freely than back in the days when I was searching for “love” advice outside of  myself.

What would happen if you accept what’s intrinsic and awesome about everyone you feel drawn toward for who they are, as they are, right now?

It’s worth a try. Love is magical.

xoxo Dana

 

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