This arrived in my inbox a few days ago, in a newsletter from Brendon Burchard. I’m not quite sure how I became subcribed to his newsletter, what initially attracted me to subscribe, but I think it was a video I saw of him telling his story of being in a near-fatal car accident and realizing he had to change his life. His way was first to model the best practices and messages of other self-help superstars. Ultimately, he became one of them in his own way. While I am constantly concerned that this guy doesn’t sleep and has adrenal fatigue (is anyone ever this excited and charged-up all the time?!), every so often a message from him will strike me in such a deeply resonant way that I can’t help but get excited.
This one really moved me.
For all the fear we have of quitting the devils that we know, it is only when we quit them that the good stuff can arrive.
Devils are familiar.
I once dated a man who was seperated and not yet divorced. He was still attached to this marriage, and I coudn’t see it that way since I had never been married. He saw his wife frequently, he talked to her constantly and in a deeply emotional way and he was even doing business with her that I was not aware of at the time. Once he got divorced, finally, I was already checked out of our relationship. We both say that had we met when the divorce was final, things would likely have been different.
While I was with him, I met another guy. I didn’t realize he was similarly not really in a space to be with me either, but since I didn’t hsave the clarity of my own freedom, and I was still attached to my own dragging relationship, this seemed somewhat like a great event. Once the new one seemed secure, I quit the other one. I will never do this again— atop of being against my own morality, I also wound up with the same crappy relationship though this time I felt wholly responsible for my misery.
You see this with jobs, with people… trying to find a replacement before quitting what you have, even though what you have is making you miserable.
But… when you are miserable, its really hard to attract amazing new things!!!
You can only have space to commit to so many things at a time in your life. I love it when people say “compartmentalize”— as though you can stick things like your health or your business or your relationships into little imaginary boxes and stow them away. When you do that in a home, stow away the things you can’t deal with, they build up until your closets are busting at the seams. Same thing happens with your attention for life— you can only really have the space for the new when you get rid of the old.
Dare to divorce the devils you know. If something is plaguing your spirit, dominating your mind in a negative way or otherwise dragging you down, why are you holding on so tightly to it?
You only get today once. Just once. Why waste it?! xoxo Dana