You quit drama.
You left bad things behind.
And now… you should feel exuberant, but you don’t!?!
Has this happened to you?
A breakup, a job you quit, a habit you broke… And yet, you feel terrible!
There are a handful of things that can happen when you walk away from a toxic life in any way and start fresh, taking steps toward your future in bright ways.
Don’t run back to the badlands of suppressed dreams and toxic entanglements just because it is familiar!
That is what can happen if you aren’t able to see the little bumps on the road to your dreamscape as part of the detox process.
That said, here are the top 5* life detox side effects I have observed (and have experienced many times!) that manifest as you move from toxic to thriving, from bottled-up to unleashed!!!
(*Keep in mind, each of these has within them the potential to re-shape your universe in a gorgeous way!)
1. Fear sits where you thought excitement would be!
You know, you were so damn excited the moment you walked out the door of that horrible job you had, and it seemed that daily life would be a party once it was over… but it suddenly isn’t.
That’s what happened to me when I left a crazy job in art where an illustrous man would throw things at me and call me stupid all day on a bad day. For two weeks I basically sat in fear and anger at home, while I should have felt wildly proud and excited about the opportunities I had to create a new and less-toxic life.
What was really more stunning is that after a third week, he called me and begged me to come back. And…. I did! And it was the stupidest and most short-lived decision ever!
Fear has a way of twisting energy into balls of numbness if it takes over. And when you feel numb or confused, the devils you left behind seem quite gentle and benevolent in hindsight.
Which brings me to #2.
2. Romanticizing the past creeps in.
Emotional patterns are habits. We carry that energy cycle around with us, and in a sense, we get used to being oppressed.
Some people get addicted to the surging stress chemical rush of drama and stress, like in a tumultuous relationship. There are people I have seen who use toxic relationships as a way to hide from their own talents because they are not sure how to bring them to life or if they even deserve to bring them to life.
I had an old friend who would break up with her boyfriend who is as wildly emotional as she is just about every six weeks. Maudlin tears and violent anger would pour out… and then the proclamation of love would come. “You don’t understand, I just love him so much I really need to try this again!” Back to the romance of the past… and soon back to the toxic relationship… it would go all over again.
Overcoming the addiction to that rush can be as easy as replacing it with the heathy rush of excitement before going out on a date or the feeling you get after a great jog or an amazing session of acupunture or just about anything you love to do that makes you feel good!
3. Bad habits you thought were gone try to pop up…or aches and pains, colds and the like come to light…
When your energetic pattern in used to having stress on it, and suddenly there is no stress, if you aren’t mindful you can create stress to fill in the space where happiness was growing.
With so much free time now that you finally moved out of a bad roomate situation, you envisioned yourself going to the gym… but instead you are going to the bar at the corner where more people just like her are waiting for you to befriend them.
Or… with a great new diet and exercise plan, you find yourself pushing so hard that you feel broken instead of energized.
The temptation is to fill the white space of life with something. Consciously fill it with creative activities rather than letting the world fill it with more clutter.
4. You are wildly unproductive.
I moved to New York at 22 years old to write a novel. I spend 90% of the time in the first 6 weeks there feeling like I was waiting for life to happen.
I remember walking the streets of New York in the Summer as the world seemed to be rushing past me in crowds of hard-working people getting out of the office at 6pm thinking, ” I am pretty sure I am on the verge of ceasing to exist. How am I ever going to get this done?”
I did a Master Cleanse. I drank coffee. I sat down every night from about 8pm to 2am. I chain-smoked. I cried. And one day, I started writing in a way I never thought I could: it was suddenly effortless. And in 4 weeks what took me months to start finally got finished.
No one will stick a pen in your hand, sit you in front of a canvas, pick up the phone and make the calls for you, or anything else that in a magical universe we fantacize will happen to make our dreams come true. While it might seem that now you have all the time in the world because your life isn’t filled with toxic crap, you still have to create things!!!
5. Your once-bright vision of the future feels absent all of a sudden.
In a space where everything is possible, nothing is possible.
When you were working 70 hours a week I bet you had a pretty crisp vision of what you would do on your year-long sabbatical, but now that you are on that break you are no longer seeing that vision…
And it sucks.
There is a difference between fantasy and visualizing your future. In fantasy, it is all effortless and the world is somewhat more charmed than it is in any version of reality. In reality, there are charmed days, and there are not charmed days.
Your actual vision for the future is something so clearthat it won’t fade, but it morphs as you start living it, expanding out further into the future. Your real vision for your life is something that isn’t a daydream, it is something you are excited to fight for is you need to… and something you can bring to life on a daily basis.
Move from fantasy to a real purpose for your life. Write yourself a business plan, get help to get clear on a vision that is realisic for a relationship, infuse your work with a real purpose that brings you into alignment with what is true about your life.
The antidotes to all of these temporary side effects that come from detoxing your life?
* Treat yourself like a precious object. Love yourself more and more. Sleep. Eat. Play. The stronger your energy becomes the weaker the side effects of all this detoxing will be!
* Immerse yourself in high-energy spaces. Yes… super high-energy!!! This can help:
* & Create things, anyway, without worrying. Simple. Sit down. Create. Create. Create more.
The way out of this space of detoxing and revamping and reorganizing right now is to go through it.
When the spell is broken- and for all of you who persist, it will be broken!!!- you emerge shining, bright, powerful and secure in a newer, higher place in life. Really, you will!!! xoxo Dana
P.S.: The Catalyst Camp is coming to open up your life to the new like never before! It’s 8 weeks of de-cluttering, letting things go any lightening up life in radical ways.
You can sign up HERE to start the free 3-video series & revolutionize your clutter clearing.
And, if you want to dive in to your own personalized feng shui in a modern, practical way, Say hello to Feng Shui 101. Its the guide I made for you to create your own personalized feng shui at home, in the office, wherever you may be… in 8 weeks. It’s not filled with strict rules or what you “must” do. Its filled with information, questions, exercises and even videos and classes to help you confidently create amazing spaces with killer feng shui and live with more flow. Learn more about the 8-week feng shui adventure & grab your copy to get started right HERE… And, as always, please let me know what happens!
So great to read
Thank you Dana for articulating this, I am very aware of the physical detox symptoms after a treatment or cleanse but had never really considered what happens in the gaps once you free up space in your life or mind. This was timely for me as I replace long-held limiting habits with positive and ambitious patterns and appreciate any help to keep me on track going forwards. Thank you as always for your motivation, insight and kindness.
i am thrilled to hear this! its a big one and something not alot of us think about!!! 🙂