Living is a trip these days.  Who knew that while you can carry in your purse or pocket a device that made it impossible to escape all the things and people and stuff in your life…and we all need an escape.

If you let it, life can take over completely. And it’s not just the digital take-over of life.  It’s even the expansive things- like the 2 1/2 hours it seems to take to get to and from and through a yoga class if its not planned well.  Or the trips to multiple markets to get the most amazing food… or just to get simple groceries, depending on where and how you live.

While there’s so much to designing a lifestyle that you can do, that’s a trap in itself.  I once had a life with days filled with cooking meals, taking walks, practicing Buddhism and doing all kinds of radical self-care stuff.  Yep. I didn’t work for that year.  It was at first quite amazing… and then, the returns diminished so greatly I can’t tell you how shocking it was.

Nothing is meant to be that intensely “perfect.”

In a decade of  helping to design lifestyles, I can tell you five big questions that universely spark change.  They might just inspire a great shift for you, too!

I had a man last night tell me out of the blue in a very oracle-like way that my biggest challenge was not getting lost in all the work I was doing.

“But…” I said, “I design lifestyles, I won’t get lost.”

I was being a bit too arrogant. I have gotten lost at times. I can’t tell you much about December or January that didn’t involve a camera, computer …

We all get lost.  Nothing is perfect.  It’s a blessing to be busy.  And most everyone is busy… even dramatically so.

But, that doesn’t mean its OK to carry on without some sense of balance after an extreme storm of anything blows over!

In the service of designing a lifestyle, you might want to ask yourself:

What are you missing out on?

There’s always something missing from a life that isn’t really styled.  You know what I mean.  Are you missing time with your family or time with yourself? Are you missing adventure?

Having spent most of my teenage years locked in my bedroom studying myself into a happy oblivion (or so I thought) as soon as I got into college I realized I was missing adventure… and I made up for lost time in the most extreme heights I could find!  I even ran away to Malaga, Spain for a week with a relative stranger at 17 because… well… I needed to live more, right?

While my 6 year adventure and surreal life-as-a-VIP- party streak took me around the world and into spaces that almost noone gets to see, well, I can’t say I regret it, but I paid a very big price for my “makeup time.” My friends and I often laugh cautiously about the adventures we survivivedin the spirit of carpe diem.

This is what happens when you let things go missing for too long in my experience: making up for lost time with an extreme vengance, and possibly not in good ways.

Where can you find it?

There’s a much easier way to find what you need than to wait until its a life crisis.  If you need to exercise, can you find something you like to do with people, perhaps, in a group?  A sport? Can you find a way to insist upon family time?  There’s a very famous man who insists on ending the workday at 4pm no matter waht time it starts so that there is family time every day.  Trust me, you can say that’s easy because he has money, but its not easy when you have massive responsibility that comes with massive money.

Insist on something easy and you will like stop missing out on things.

How can you sleep better?

No amazing lifestyle is without rest.  I don’t care what you say about how impossible it is: it is possible.  If you can’t find more hours, find more depth of sleep in a bedroom with better feng shui.  THESE simple tips can help a ton. 

How can you love more?

Want a better life?  Learn to love more.

Done.

That simple.

Being kinder to people on the street, having more compassion, letting people be who they are, accepting life more, dropping the impossibly high bar that you may have set for your partner…

Calm down.  Love more.  That is our nature.

Is there something you’re ready to let go of?

Lifestyles that work are always in a state of declutter.  Letting go of negativity… Confronting and cearing away problems rather than letting them linger. Every so often I make a massive list of looming or annoying or dragging things around me and get going on the life-declutter.

Declutter your space while you’re at it.

The lighter you are, the easier it is to accept that you can have a life by your own design.

And you can. Imperfectly.  And perfect for you.

xoxo Dana

********************

And, if you want to dive in to your own personalized feng shui in a modern, practical way, Say hello to Feng Shui 101.  Its the guide I made for you to create your own personalized feng shui at home, in the office, wherever you may be… in 8 weeks.  It’s not filled with strict rules or what you “must” do.  Its filled with information, questions, exercises and even videos and classes to help you confidently create amazing spaces with killer feng shui and live with more flow.   Learn more about the 8-week feng shui adventure & grab your copy to get started right HERE…  And, as always, please let me know what happens!