You can transform anything.
Taking out the trash transforms the energy of a stagnant area of a room.
That same principle can be applied to so many other facets of life.
My wish is that every three months is a period of magnificent transformation.
For me and for you.
If we stay the same, we sink.
If we transform, we grow.
If you are ready for a some alchemy in your own life- changing what’s stuck to what’s dynamically alive- commit to the transformation and go on the ride!
It started when I hacked off about four inches of straggling, struggling, sun-torn hair. Hair is thought to hold memories. As I lopped a lot of it off, sitting in West Hollywood in a sun-filled space, I felt very ready for a new chapter.
My chapters of life have been extraordinary. Even the intensely hard ones.
There has been a missing link to the next phase, a something that I should do, something that I couldn’t quite articulate.
Have you been there? You know you should be doing something but you can’t quite get to the “what”?
In Arizona this past weekend, I got another reading at Mind Body Green’s Revitalize from Naomi Pabst. I should qualify that she’s not simply a natural “intuitive” but she’s a studied master, once a professor at Harvard and Yale for over a decade, carrying real heft of depth with her words. Because I find psychic stuff to be just stories at best because I am quite rooted in the idea that we have utter free-will to create reality, I approacted this in a much different way. I wanted to see what insight I could get from someone who hadn’t seen me in a year, someone intuitive and brilliant.
Here’s what I heard, and I wanted to share:
Self-Mastery
One can have no smaller or greater mastery than mastery of oneself. ? Leonardo da Vinci
That’s a pretty big statement. And a huge concept!
The first thing that flashed in my mind when I heard the words “self-mastery” :
Forgive. I have to be the bigger person and forgive.
That was the start of radical forgiveness in my own life. You can read more about this space-clearing concept right HERE.
This is something I knew I had to rise to, as I could feel how important it was.
As we spoke more about self-mastery, the idea of demanding attention, ideas, and interest from others came to the forefront.
This is what I mean:
When you’re empty, you are needy.
It’s like being extremely hungry.
Feed yourself throughout the day and you likely won’t crave extraordinary- maybe ridiculous- amounts of any food you can get your hands on.
Starve yourself for a day, and see what happens.
Same goes for love, for money, for rest, for admiration, for praise.
Give enough of it to yourself and you won’t crave it from others to a degree that will leave you always hungry and needy.
Give to yourself until you are super-full of greatness.
In terms of self-mastery, the idea is that you can only be in control of what you do: not what other people respond to, not what you get back, not how things land, not anything else.
We are responsible for bringing our best selves to the table, being generous and being open.
Of course, this concept has nothing to do with pitching your energy into a black hole of people who suck the life from you and offer nothing in exchange as a perpetual habit.
This is about: being the one to show praise, to give admiration, to love first, to be willing to be OK with not getting praise, admiration or love because you are already full of enough of all of that.
Give yourself praise, admiration and love. You’ll know when you are doing a great enough dose of this love because you won’t crave excesses of it from others!
And, as we wrapped up our chat, it moved to the theme of a blooming Spring that required patience to cultivate. Love in bloom, art in bloom, health in bloom All real changes require this kind of patience.
Commit to seasons of transformation.
It won’t be tomorrow that you wake up and every thought you’ve ever had that works against your best intentions will be wiped away. It’s not about “perfect” thoughts, or “erasing” impulses It’s about awareness.
Listen to the voices telling you to sit on the couch and get up to walk anyway. Listen to the sabotaging voices of the past and go forward anyway.
The only way to do this- confirmed by researchers worldwide- is to do it.
Keep making the choices that open up your life and move you toward more love, more peace and more prosperity.
If you’ve been stuck in any way, those choices will likey feel weird.
Keep making them. See how they land. Watch what happens. Love yourself more and more in the process. Be the one to give to share to show up. Commit to the time it takes, even if its a long-haul of time. And keep life lighter and free of stuck anger, hurt, resentment, and all the stuff that makes it hard to be present and keep expanding.
Self-Mastery is a journey, not the end product. It’s a lifestyle choice. And, I might add, it’s far from selfish.
The more you can master you, the less you’ll bring static to others and the more you can bring an open mind and open heart and really beautiful energy that excites the world around you.
It’s not just worth a try, its worth the commitment if you are ready for the next chapter on a new level.
xoxo Dana
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Love this text Dana. I really Want to go back in the archive to read your other inspiring words But can’t find it here on the page:(
thank you for this article! Here I am, almost ‘wallowing’, not a good thing, and I come across this article. You are truly a blessing to me. At my very senior age, it’s wonderful to know, it’s now that matters. Thank You Dana for your insight and wisdom.