In all the feng shui consultations I’ve done that are focused in building wealth, building love, building creativity… all of it is rooted in one huge principle for the last decade:

Integrity.

In a world filled with amazing people, you’ll also likely find that there’s noise, there’s criticism, there’s unfairness and there’s also straight up “lack of integrity.”

If you’re focused on building an even bigger life that feels amazing to you in every way, your integrity is so much a part of your product.

Not only is it vital to keep your own integrity- staying as aligned as possible with everything that you believe in- it’s vital that you can, in your own best ways, take a stand for yourself when confronted with a lack of integrity.

There’s that saying:  ” What you put up with, you end up with.”  There’s also a great one that I’ve seen hold true: ” You reap what you sow.”

When you’re faced with a bunch of stuff that has an impact on your personal integrity, it’s important that you transform that energy so it doesn’t stay in your path!

Today, let’s talk about restoring integrity to your home and your life where you feel stuck, small or otherwise mistreated… and in the process, restoring more brilliance to your whole life!

I’ve had such blasts to my own integrity at times, and it’s been earth-shattering in how it’s forced me to stick up for myself.

In the past, I’d hold onto poison.  I’d let things that were clearly destructive slide by and sort of geared myself to think that by ignoring it all, it was going to go away.

I’d been told everything under the sun that’s negative about myself, including one memorable speech from a bar owner when I quit cocktail waitressing with plenty of notice and a replacement for my shifts to shoot a commercial many years ago that “I’d be lucky to get a job acting in porn.”   How lovely.

This guy has gone on to be disgraced in public multiple times, so, that says a lot.

I was also told by myriad employers that I would amount to nothing, that I was stupid and that my best chance for a career was to marry someone quickly because I was so pathetic.

Yes, for some reason, I brought out the fire in some terrible people I worked for when I had terrible jobs that helped to support me as I figured out my life.

And… just like the clutter that builds in your closets, hidden out of sight, so does this swallowing of poison.

I’m not an advocate of staying angry, not a fan of feeling victimized and not big on screaming and yelling or revenge.

With enough of this swallowing of poison, though, I started to lose faith in myself.  My personal integrity was crumbling because I took all of this judgement on, profoundly.  Objectively, people who worked with me and who knew me well couldn’t fathom where it was coming from… but personally, I came to see it wasn’t something I needed to figure out beyond the fact that I was doing jobs that were ill suited for me in general.

To change my work life, I had to restore my own integrity first.  Then, I decided to work for different people in a different capacity.  I never encountered this wild judgement stuff again!

Here’s something I find extremely helpful when I have had to restore the wholeness to parts of my life that felt smushed:

Self-expression. 

When you’ve been on the receiving end of a bad situation, it’s very vital not to swallow it.

Even if you can’t state it directly to whoever has encroached upon your life in a negative way, at the very least… get it all out of your system.

Write a letter to the person or group and burn it, freeing yourself of the negativity.

Tell people how you feel once you’re clear minded and out of the most emotionally heated part of your feelings if you can…

Another vital way I’ve come to restore energy to any part of life where this lack of integrity has happened:

Responsibility.

See how you could have, in some way, brought this into your life.

Were you silent when you should have spoken up.  Did you convince yourself that “things would just work themselves out” as I have so many times in the past?

Seeing how you allowed yourself to perhaps stay in a bad relationship, a damning friendship, a mismatched partnership or anything else can be incredibly freeing.

Sometimes it’s impossible to see how things transpired because the events were a shock or a major trauma, and in those cases, I’ve found that taking responsibilty for healing myself was the best responsibility I could take.

The best way I know to rise above a lack of integrity is this:

Compassion. 

I’ve found that sometimes the people who’ve lied to me in harmful ways, deliberately hurt me or otherwise acted in unthinkable ways were barely present in their lives.  They were hurt, they were addicts, they were angry, they were overcome by forces that they didn’t know how to control.  I often say that their demons get the best of them.

My demons have gotten the best of me in the past, and I remind myself of this when I’ve been wronged in ways that are unthinkably bad.

Compassion has a way of turning anger into a higher level of understanding.

Send some well wishes and good energy to the people who’ve harmed you if they have.  It may seem like the opposite of what you want to do, but they likely need the help more than you!

Instead of letting the lack of integrity shake your life, you can find ways to restore it for yourself.

Restore integrity to your mind, body and soul.   Treat yourself brilliantly.  Be your best friend.  Double down on the things that make you feel amazing.  Ask for the help you need.

Restore integrity to your space.   Clean up and polish things.  Do space clearing (open windows and burn that sage!).  Weed the low-self-esteem items out of your house.

Every single one of us is equally valuable.  Our time is precious.  Our energy is vital.

All the rest of that integrity-sapping lack of respect, lack of care and lack of decency…

That’s not something you want to hold onto.  That’s something to let go of, right now.

Let it go in practical ways, make your space shine and you’ll become free of all that judgement and negativity .  You’ll be able to soar wherever you’ve been stuck.

When you restore integrity to your own life, the magic happens.

xoxo Dana

P.S.: The Love Camp is coming (!!!) to transform life with so much more love! It’s the ultimate in Feng Shui to multiply your manifesting magic.

The FREE 3-Video series kicks things off right HERE!!! It’s packed with Feng Shui to help you create even more openness, magnetism and more LOVE in awesome, tangible ways!

This hour of Feng Shui videos for love starts soon and it’s only up for 21 days a year…so if you’re ready for a lighter, brighter, more love-filled life, you won’t want to miss it! xoxo!!!

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Welcome to Creating Genius!
I spent the last year creating this e-guide to balancing and unblocking life by pulling together the best of a decade of space-changing and life-shifting feng shui! It’s 50 days and 50 ways to use feng shui to shift your space and your routines to move from “stuck” to creatively inspired and alive.

Start Creating Genius right HERE!

Gather up your magic & make gorgeous dreams come true!

xoxo Dana