What you’re focused on is what will grow.
What’s ignored will not flourish and might even sort of wither.
And… both of these things are great news because it’s like the ultimate Permission Slip to focus on everything amazing and live in self-caring, lovingly indulgent ways.
Are you focused right now on what you want to grow?
I used to be close to a group of actors who spent incredible amounts of time when they were not working working on elaborate scenes for an acting class. The reason given to me by the most successful actress at the time in the group was simple, “You are professionally what you spend most of your time doing.”
Even for all but the most prolific few actors, there’s typically downtime between jobs. These people chose to spend a lot of it focused on their craft. They worked tons, a lot of them quite famous now or at least very recognizable.
I don’t know if this was “the actual reason why” they worked so much, but what stuck with me was that phrase… you are professionally what you spend most of your time doing.
It intrigued me because I spent most of my time when I wasn’t doing odd jobs busy procrastinating, focusing on the fact that I was very broken and fixated on fixing things. Even when I was working, doing, creating, I was so fixed on what was wrong I wasn’t 100% myself. My life reflected that broken web of mess far more than anything else I did, no matter what fix I tried.
We know that practice creates lots of skill, confidence, mastery…
But, I’ve come to see over the years that even when I thought I was “so focused” and practicing and doing and seemingly so busy, I couldn’t budge the needle of success very much at times, and now, looking backward, it’s very clear for me, personally, why.
I’m not into living like a robot (to be clear, those stringent ways aren’t really artful or genius for lots of us, arguably all of us) so, what was the thing that was making life so impossibly hard a nut to crack?
I was scattered all over the place. During the day, in my mind, in my home, in my energy. It was like a battle between “my broken self” and “creating success.”
I realize it’s super-common now, and I didn’t realize this before.
When I say I was scattered, I don’t mean that I was in apparent chaos, apparent clutter or apparent ill health or energy. I looked great— it all looked great— I said the right things— I looked the part. But nothing worked.
Someone told me that I would see in my life what I was putting my attention toward. I would see it come back to me in growth and signs from the universe, confirmations… or a lack thereof.
My fixation with what was wrong led me down a very dark spiral of more things that were wrong.
I was distracted my my own worries, fears and the chaos they caused.
Distractions are interesting because they are subtle and often disguised as important things to know and to do.
One immense and seemingly innocent distraction is focusing on what you don’t want.
I’m not talking about passing thoughts or worries or a few bad days or a crisis time.
I’m talking about focus. The theme song you play in your head, habits, the overall way things go.
If you’re focused overall on the good, you’ll see it.
If you’re focused overall on the lack, you’ll see it.
If you’re focused on who hasn’t shown up to the party you might even miss all the people who are there.
It’s not what you’re “doing” as much as the energy with which you’re doing it that matters. You can be radically busy and not at all focused on what you really want!
Have you ever had a so much worry that things were going to go bad and you worked with those worries in mind so that you could “prevent” those bad things from happening… only to get underwhelming results?
Indeed: you can work really hard and still be focused on what you don’t want.
Let. It. Go.
You may not be able to monitor every thought in your mind but one thing is clear to me now: what I’m seeing in my home and in my life is a pretty keen snapshot of what’s been going on with my own focus.
If something’s out of whack, find something new to focus on. It doesn’t have to be perfect focus, just more focus on what you really want.
It can be that easy to turn the tides and change the energy in your days immensely.
Of course, your home can help you with that focus. Clarity. Energy. Messaging. Flow. Harmony. Mood. Vibes.
You can shift your home to master more of your life as an art form, a masterpiece, an adventure.
See where you’ve been focused. Change it if need be.
Watch new and awesome things grow!
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